Lessons
by Khiori
Summary: Spock learns more about his heart.


He stood in the shadows just outside the room.

The smooth clear tones of an Old Earth waltz recording was playing softly in the background.

He edged closer to watch, setting his carryall quietly on the cool stone tiles at his feet.

His mother was clothed in the soothing blue robes that were her current favorite, a marked contrast from the other who stood in the crisp lines of a Starfleet uniform.

Spock felt a deep pang in his heart.

 _Saavik._

Amanda was laughing.

"Be _serious_ , Saavik!"

"I assure you, Amanda, I am quite serious."

Amanda collapsed into an elegant carved chair, still laughing. "You _can't_ take a weapon onto the _dance_ floor! It's not proper etiquette!"

Saavik's rising eyebrow spoke volumes of what she thought of etiquette.

The corner of his mouth twitched.

He remembered her first response as a wild thing from Hellguard to the subject.

It had taken him several hours to pick up all the broken objects.

"On Earth," Saavik said calmly, "your observation may be entirely accurate. However, I assure you, that it is quite appropriate precaution on a rather large number of worlds."

"Saavik!"

"I am certain Ambassador Sarek will provide collaborating evidence to support my statement."

" _Saavik!_ "

The other sighed. "Very well, I will be unarmed." She gave Amanda a displeased look. "There will be adequate Security present, correct?"

"Saavik! For pity's sake, it's a _dance_ , not the Neutral Zone!"

"And yet," Saavik frowned repressingly, "there will be Romulans present."

Spock's eyebrow shot up in surprised concern. He edged ever so slightly closer protectively.

"Oh, for goodness sakes! They're _diplomats_."

Saavik's disapproval only deepened. "That only marks them as being known for higher levels of cunning, Amanda."

Amanda wrinkled her nose at the other woman. "Now you're just being obstinate. And you'd better not let Sarek hear what you think about diplomats." Her blue eyes glinted mischievously. "Besides, the new Ambassador likes you."

Spock stiffened in distinct sudden disapproval.

Saavik looked outright ill. "I most assuredly did _not_ need to know that information."

The teasing light in Amanda's eyes only brightened. "He's good looking, too."

"Amanda!"

"You've got to practice sometime!"

"Engaging in inappropriate relationships?"

" _Dancing!_ "

"I do."

Amanda gave her a mock glare. "Sarek and I don't count!"

Saavik looked at the arched ceiling as if for some sort of divine support. "And why would I wish to dance a Human waltz with the Romulan Ambassador?"

"IDIC?"

"Amanda."

"Then how about a Romulan dance with the Romulan Ambassador?" Amanda asked innocently.

Saavik stopped, eyeing Amanda suddenly suspiciously. "Hellguard was not renowned for its civilized social activities."

"But you do know Romulan dancing."

Spock's eyebrow rose sharply in surprise.

Saavik's eyes narrowed dangerously. "You did _not_."

Amanda smiled sweetly. "I most certainly did." At the look on Saavik's face, she laughed. "What? Did you truly think Vulcan diplomats were any less cunning than Romulan ones?"

"I am very . . . displeased with you, Amanda."

"Good."

Saavik's eyebrow lifted in disbelief. " _Good?_ "

"Children are supposed to be angry at their parents every now and then. It keeps the relationship healthy."

Saavik gave an almost dramatic sigh. "Two points, Amanda. One, I seriously question your grasp of basic psychology, and two, I am not our child."

Amanda's eyes glinted wickedly. "Both of which can easily be remedied rather swiftly."

Saavik opened her mouth to respond and then narrowed her eyes again at the older woman as she processed the statement. "Amanda, what have you been doing?"

"Use that vast intellect and figure it out."

Saavik's mouth firmed. "That is a decidedly Valeris chastisement."

Amanda abruptly frowned and shook her finger at the young woman. "You be nice."

"Or I will not be allowed to attend the dance?"

Amanda snorted. "That would be rewarding you. No, you be nice or . . . . Or the Vulcan Ambassador will suddenly invite the new Romulan Ambassador over for dinner. Diplomatic relationships, you know."

Saavik blanched. "I formally surrender."

"Amanda sobered and studied her a long moment. "You are going to be mine."

Saavik blinked. "I . . . beg your pardon?"

Amanda smiled and leaned up on her toes to brush fond fingers against Saavik's cheek. "A subject for later, my dear." She straightened and looked Saavik firmly right in the eyes. "Speaking of which, Spock is scheduled to come home tomorrow."

Spock held himself very, very still in the doorway.

Saavik shifted abruptly and looked away. "We . . . are not speaking."

"I know," said Amanda quietly. "May I ask why?"

Spock braced himself.

"No."

Amanda frowned. "Perhaps, if you came tomorrow-"

Saavik said nothing.

Amanda sighed. She reached out and laid a hand on Saavik's sleeve. "Whatever this is, I'm sure it can be worked out."

Spock found himself staring hard at Saavik.

Saavik looked down at the tiles beneath her boots. "I do not know if it can." Her head lifted. "Valeris has volunteered to act as our mediator."

Amanda winced. "I would prefer it, if the two of you would do your _own_ talking."

Saavik shook her head firmly. "Valeris is our only commonality now. She is my friend and has attained his fondness as his most accomplished student. If there is still a possibility for . . . some form of association between us, I believe he will be most willing to consider it through her advice."

Amanda made a face. "And that's what worries me."

Spock tilted his head confused.

Saavik's brow furrowed. "Why? Valeris is trusted by both of us."

Amanda looked at her a long moment almost sadly. "I know." She sighed and rubbed the bridge of her nose. "This sounds like you are telling me you will be leaving before he arrives."

Saavik nodded carefully. "I do not wish to cause conflict in your House by my presence, Amanda."

Spock found he would have overlooked it willingly.

She looked at Amanda hesitantly. "Are you . . . displeased now with me as well?"

Amanda brushed fond fingers over Saavik's crimson uniform. "Only that you are leaving and everything isn't right yet and I shall _miss_ you."

Saavik's eyes became very soft. "I shall miss you as well," she said quietly.

"You will come back, won't you?" Amanda asked suddenly.

Spock felt his chest tighten and he looked at Saavik.

"Perhaps it would be best-" Saavik began and then looked into Amanda's face.

Even from where he stood hidden, Spock could see what was in those blue eyes.

"How . . . how long is he scheduled to stay?" asked Saavik quietly.

Amanda beamed suddenly, though she brushed her eyes quickly. "Only four days. His ship is in dock just for resupplies."

Saavik straightened her shoulders and gave a curt nod. "Then I will return on the fifth." Her confidence abruptly wavered. "If . . . if that is acceptable with you."

Amanda's smile was genuinely loving. "You are _always_ welcome, dear-heart."

Saavik's fair skin colored and she bowed. "Until then."

Amanda bowed back. "Until then."

Spock blended quickly back further into the shadows in the hallway, taking his carryall with him. He felt a curious pain about his heart.

Saavik reached the threshold.

"Saavik?" Amanda called.

She turned, making her dark hair spill over her shoulder and causing Spock to be momentarily lost in the realization of just how much he truly longed to heal the rift between them.

"Yes, Amanda?"

"He _is_ good looking."

Saavik gave a derisive snort at the teasing, making Amanda laugh. Then she disappeared down the hall and out the estate's main doors.

Spock felt a genuine sense of sudden loss.

He waited in absolute silence for several minutes and then quietly slipped back down the hall, to stand at the great window and watch Saavik walk away.

Amanda appeared at his side and gave him a look he knew all too well from childhood. "You will correct this, Spock. I once lost my son; I will not lose the one I have come to see as my daughter."

He bowed in obedience but said nothing. Saavik had gone and that was all his mind seemed able to focus on.

His mother sighed and touched his arm gently. "Come, Spock, put your carryall in your room. I will tell your father that you have come home early."

He nodded and went through the quiet halls. He paused at his door and then looked slowly to the one directly opposite it. He hesitated, then moved quietly to the door without ever consciously having made the decision to do so. It opened for him and he stood just outside.

This was her room.

He knew his mother had given her place the day he had left in the Klingon warbird. When she returned to space duty, the room had curiously remained, waiting silently for shoreleaves.

It smelled softly like her. Like pine in the mountains on Earth at midday. And something almost like the spiced desert incense of Gol.

He closed the door firmly behind him with suddenly shaking hand and went to unpack.

He would ask Valeris to send her a message from him. Perhaps . . . perhaps there truly was still a . . . possibility for them.

Spock finished his unpacking in solitude.

Thinking of Saavik learning to dance without him.


End file.
